What Took you so Long?

OK so it's been a slow month at The Satellite and I can't begin to apologize enough nor will I make excuses. But, I will offer this for my reason, I'm lazy. Most of you who know me will agree whole-heartedly. I'm like a department store Santa Claus after Christmas or a Time Square hooker on January 2nd. I just didn't feel like working. Oh, but watch out because now I'm rested and the gloves are off and like Brett Favre, I only came back for one thing and that is to win The Super Bowl. Speaking of Favre, even though The Vikings beat The Cowboys, I've been closely following him all year and I'm pulling for the old guy. I like to see some gray-haired quarterback showing all those young punks how it's done. Speaking of old, Happy Birthday Michelle Obama! Our First Lady has been a part of the world's population for 46 years now and still hasn't grown into those teeth. Yikes! You could open a can of Ranch Style Beans with those things. What else?...Oh, more old people in the news. Well, not old but dead. It was announced this week that Jimi Hendrix and Johnny Cash would be releasing new albums soon. I know, that's not really very impressive since dead guys have been putting out music for years. Hell, Nat King Cole even did a duet with his daughter after he died. What would be impressive is if Hendrix and Cash did an album together. I even have a title, "The Black Man and The Man in Black: Together at Last". I'd buy it! I mean what else is out there? There's been some fuss about someone named Ke$ha lately. I haven't actually heard the song but I can smell crap when crap is present. I do have 3 kids, so I have a good nose for feces and I'm quite sure that whatever this Ke$ha character is singing needs to be wiped up and put in the garbage. Which leads me to Jay Leno. NBC, the once respected and watched network, is moving Jay Leno back to his 11:30 EST spot and forcing Conan O'Brien to vacate the only time slot that The Tonight Show has ever known. This really isn't much of a surprise, after all this is the same network that brought you quality programs like, "Saved by the Bell" and not only the original "Knight Rider" but then they tried to sneak "Knight Rider 2000" by us like we wouldn't notice that it was the same ol' bag of frozen corn that they fed us in the 80s. Nevertheless, Leno has comedians in an uproar about his willingness to just have NBC cast Conan aside and unlike Brett Favre, he's one old grey-hair I hope crashes and burns.