Blocked Below the Waist

CBS, America's Most Watched Network, has denied a Super Bowl commercial spot to the gay dating website, ManCrunch.com. The ad depicts 2 guys watching the game and both reaching into the bowl of chips at the same time, brushing hands and
locking eyes leading to a very un-manly game of tonsel hockey. One CBS executive, speaking off the record stated, "Having a gay commercial during the Super Bowl would be like NASCAR adding Toyotas to the field", "We'd lose more viewers that we'd ever hope to gain" he went on to say, "not that there's anything wrong with being gay". This has the gay rights community up in arms. "It's clearly a form of discrimination" says Deion Jackson, leader of the gay rights group, MENsa. "If they can put those beer commercials on with all those half-naked b*tches, then they can air this too". But there was also support for the CBS decision from some. Former NFL quarterback, Jeff Garcia said, "C'mon gay guys don't eat chips and sit around in a room decorated with traffic signs", "Not that I would know of anyway...because I'm not gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that." No comment yet from NFL players A.J. Hawk and Adrian Peterson whose jerseys are worn by the 2 stool pushers throughout the commercial. But in a recent poll conducted by The Satellite of Love, we found that 2 out of the 3 homosexuals we know like A.J. Hawk's hair more than Troy Polamalu's curly Samoan locks. Now that's investigative reporting. Anyway, don't expect to see any man kissing during the big game this year, I believe NBC has Super Bowl rights next year and if we know anything about that poorly run, forgotten network, they'll be happy to take ManCrunch's money and show the ad.